Venting in Therapy

by Laura

Okay, so I had my chance to vent in T last night.  For the sake of context, I'll start out here by saying that for weeks (months?) most of us, Yours Truly included, have chosen to take a backseat in T so that Charity can work on what she needs to work on.  I was in favor of this arrangement because I believe that the sooner Charity heals, the better off we'll all be.

I'm not a very patient person.  (You can stop laughing now.)  Among the 62,037 things about Charity that irritate me, high on the list is the fact that she's taking so long to work through stuff.  Allegra's reminding me right now that I can't expect Charity to work through a lifetime of trauma in only a few months, or even in the 10 years that we've been seeing this T, or in the 15 and a half years combined that we've been in T nonstop.

I'll get to Allegra's annoying habits later.

Anyway, our T listened and gave feedback and did all that other stuff that good Ts are supposed to do.  I felt heard, which isn't nearly as much the case in everyday life.  I admit that I often intentionally act like a pain in the ass to keep people at a distance.  And then I wonder why I don't feel accepted at face value.  Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

So by the end of the session, we (the T and I) agreed that it was okay for me to have the time that I need in session, and it was also okay if Charity took a break.  Fine.  I just hope that Charity's processing stuff even if she's not coming to T to talk about it.